Category Archives: Musings

Musings on….. Ageism

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Q: What is ageism?
Ageism is the stereotyping and discrimination against individuals or groups on the basis of their age; ageism can take many forms, including prejudicial attitudes, discriminatory practices, or institutional policies and practices that perpetuate stereotypical beliefs.

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I watched the Kominsky Method on Netflix and without giving too much away, it is about 2 male friends learning to deal with old age and all the crap that comes with it.

One of the lead characters in put into different situations and the audience is shown how people react to the ‘old man’.

It is sad and funny and really hit home.

52 years old and starting to see that in my own life. Right after watching that show, I was in the grocery store and a young woman and I were coming out of an end aisle at the same time, the man who almost ran into us, looked only at her and apologized.

Mind you, I have never thought if myself as a looker, never tried to be a looker, I dress modestly, wear no make-up, the days of dressing to impress died in the 90’s. My tats seem to be the most oogled thing about me. hahahha

I would rather surround my self with a gaggle of silver-haired ladies than a bunch of young uns any day. The wisdom and self-awareness and kindness is intoxicating.

I volunteered at a warehouse this past week and was amazed by all the older people there. Working hard, standing on concrete for long hours, smiling, eager to do whatever is asked of them. Many coming for multiple years to serve.

I sometimes bemoan that my life is almost over, that all my good years are behind me, but seeing these older folks gives me hope. Regardless of how people ‘see’ me, I want to live a voracious servants life of love.

Give me examples of ageism, have you experienced it?

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Musings on… My Value

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val·ue
/ˈvalyo͞o/
noun
1.
the regard that something is held to deserve; the importance, worth, or usefulness of something.
“your support is of great value”
synonyms: worth, usefulness, advantage, benefit, gain, profit, good, help, merit, helpfulness, avail;
2.
a person’s principles or standards of behavior; one’s judgment of what is important in life.
“they internalize their parents’ rules and values”
synonyms: principles, ethics, moral code, morals, standards, code of behavior
“society’s values are passed on to us as children”
verb
1.
estimate the monetary worth of (something).
“his estate was valued at $45,000”
synonyms: evaluate, assess, estimate, appraise, price, put/set a price on
“his estate was valued at $345,000”
2.
consider (someone or something) to be important or beneficial; have a high opinion of.
“she had come to value her privacy and independence”
synonyms: think highly of, have a high opinion of, hold in high regard, rate highly, esteem, set (great) store by, put stock in, appreciate, respect;

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Yesterday a bunch of older men and my hubby were talking about life insurance and he mentioned that I was upset that I don’t have any life insurance. They all, in unison, said and snickered, ‘what does she need life insurance for?’

[Patriarchy at its finest] *sarcasm font

Lately I have been thinking about my value, more, I have been feeling defeated because I don’t think I HAVE any value.

But how do I even define value? An insurance policy? A pat on the back from my family? God’s approval?

And do people who have servants hearts all feel this way?

by nature a servant is ‘below’ the people they are serving. I’m not against that. I love helping people. I’m at my best when I do that. If I am not serving, I’m not living. Not being able to say no…that is another story for another time.

by nature a servant thinks of others needs. Most of the time before their own. Servants have empathy. Why do servants do what they do?

According to the definitions above

Do they want to feel worth or usefulness

Are they abiding by rules, moral codes

Do they, or can they, put a price on their servant hood [life]

Do they want others to view them with esteem, importance, respect?

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In my case
growing up my parents weren’t the best at affection and encouraging words. my father wasn’t present in our sports, concerts, school life. He worked. Hard. He kept food in the house he maintained. His job was done, apparently. I think my dad attended one thing, my graduation.

My mother likes to blame my dad for talking down to us, in reality [or my reality] she was the one who called us stupid and any dreams and ideas were stupid.

In essence, if my dreams are stupid, the dreams are a part of me, so I’m stupid. This also would follow the same lines…[If being gay is wrong/sinful and I am gay, then I am sinful and wrong.] *sorry, rabbit trail

Fast forward to marriage, birth of son [in the interim years, I never kept a boyfriend long, never was going to let anyone hurt me, another story for another time]

Shitty start to a relationship..and after son was born, MAJOR depression. Mix in some alcoholism and poof…. feelings of inadequacy and not being able to work, and ending up in a week-long hospital stay… ugh. hate just thinking about it.

Played stay-at-home mom with relish. As I remember hubby and I agreed to it. made better sense. Too much work always stressed me. We didn’t have a financial burden to worry about. Since we are dealing with value and this pertains to it, and even tho hubby hates it. Hubby deems money highly. He has made a good life for all his family and has worked hard to be a good provider.

Its more about things that he thinks and then proceed out of his mouth.

I’ll try not to get into too many details, but over the years, its obvious that I am not of the same ‘value’ because I don’t make money in this household.

I think it is worse in the christian culture. the bible is wrought with women being less-than and groups that hold to literal interpretations of the bible are super guilty of this.

Maybe I feel hurt because it’s the people who I think should value me the most, don’t. I know that most people just value me for what I do for them and I can handle that. They aren’t in my life all the time.

Never when I feel hurt by being under valued, do I want to stop being a servant.

What about legacy? Does that have to do with value? Will I live on in, well, I know I will only live on in people’s minds as long as they live.

Sidenote, the movie Coco stuck me hard, at first I thought it silly, but its true, only if the loved ones still remember you, you live on. hmmm.

Legacy…. I want to pass on more than just yarn to my son. Does an insurance help that? Would he value me more if he knew he was in cash money when I die? Does it really matter?

Does any of this really matter? and how do I stop these feelings? I know, I know, christian readers, my worth should in Christ. I shouldn’t care how I am treated because Christ loves me and values me.

I should look toward Him for my worth. My value.

but as we say, we are fallen sinful creatures and living the everyday life wears ya down. Christ isn’t sitting in my living room with pom poms cheering me on everyday.

How do you think about value?

No Bake Chocolaty Goodness ~ Vegan

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I think I have hit the jackpot!
I like no-bake cookies but I wanted something vegan and the vegan butters when heated just put me off.
This is my recipe for vegan No-Bake Cookies that are the BOMB~!
1 cup peanut butter [I like crunchy and you’re wrong if you eat creamy]
1/2 cup chocolate chips [vegan ones are usually semi sweet or dark, I use Simple Truth Semi-sweet from Fred Meyer]
Toss in bowl and nuke on low heat for increments of 20 seconds.
stir until desired mixture. Some might like a marbled taste.
Pour in 1/2 cup maple syrup
and
2 cups quick oats.
Stir together, scoop or hand roll into rounds and refrigerate.
*Warning, peanut butter is high in fat, but also high in protein and deliciousness.
Use for an afternoon pick-me-up or sweet tooth craving before bed. You’ll thank me later

My Blog is my Medical History Report & Scam Update

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I had a visit to a foot doctor yesterday, apparently I was born deformed with too-short calf muscles and bowed back knees which cause my feet to turn inward and walk funny.

But I was trying to remember when my son broke my foot and the only place I could find a date was here. Sept 2007.

He gave me cortisone shots in both feet and it hurt so bad, i thought I was going to pass out.

They talked of calf lengthening surgery, but NOPE. They better just be able to find an insert that fits.

~~

UPDATE on the scam… Son didn’t get any of money back from the bank because, on the phone to a bank rep, he told them he was the one physically withdrawing the money from his account.

Needless to say my hubby, the skinflint, was pissed. He talked to bank people on the phone, sent emails to all the higher-ups he could get email addresses for and all of them said they would investigate but all came to the conclusion that while they were super duper sorry, they weren’t legally obligated to protect the money [it was sons bank credit card].

Well, hubby did what he thought was right and yanked all his money from the bank. The bank he had been with for over 30 years.

funny thing, soon after the moneys transfer, son gets an email telling him how sorry the bank was for what happened to him and altho they can’t reimburse all the money, here is a token of our gratitude for banking us. $1000!

They gave him 1/4 of the moneys toward his CC. WOW!

Hubby also gave son some moneys to cover the loss.

~~

Now son has finished his move to Cali and my mothers heart is cracked a bit. I’m sad to see him go but happy he is growing and learning and thriving. There was time in our lives, I didn’t think that would be the case. Resiliency is a good trait.

~~

I’m back to knitting and crafting, will try to remember to share some pictures on here. Happy Weekend!

~~

 

 

 

Be a Kinder, Gentler You

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I have no passion for religion or politics.

I do have a passion for helping others, saving animals and cuddling. Anything furry.

Therefore where my passions lie, my thoughts and actions come from that mindset.

I don’t know much about politics, therefore I don’t care to talk much about it.

For religion, I can talk, discuss and debate with the crowd but would need help finding the verses to collaborate the discussion.

I don’t watch the news and only see what’s happening on FB news feed.

I can tell you everything about being vegan, where to adopt an animal, how to do basic care for pets and will jump out of my car to catch a stray.

I give away lots of things, much to the chagrin of my hubby. I know where to find resources for people in need and would give the coat off my back to someone if asked.

All this to say, as the years go by I realize people don’t have the same heart for things as I do. They grow up differently. They maybe had no pets, were in the military, politics, were hunters or activists. Some had terrible childhoods that shape who they are. Some had a wonderful life and that shapes who they are.

Some hearts get hard and cynical as they grow older, some soften. Some wild hearts grow calm when families and kids are made.

Some hearts find God and things change. No longer the cares of their world matter. Matters of eternity are forefront. Things like

Love the Lord your god with all your heart, mind and soul:

The Parable of the Good Samaritan

25On one occasion an expert in the law stood up to test Jesus. “Teacher,” he asked, “what must I do to inherit eternal life?”

26“What is written in the Law?” he replied. “How do you read it?”

27He answered, “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’c ; and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’” 

FROM:

LEVITICUS 18“ ‘Do not seek revenge or bear a grudge against anyone among your people, but love your neighbor as yourself. I am the Lord.

28“You have answered correctly,” Jesus replied. “Do this and you will live.”

29But he wanted to justify himself, so he asked Jesus, “And who is my neighbor?”

30In reply Jesus said: “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, when he was attacked by robbers. They stripped him of his clothes, beat him and went away, leaving him half dead. 31A priest happened to be going down the same road, and when he saw the man, he passed by on the other side. 32So too, a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. 33But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. 34He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn and took care of him. 35The next day he took out two denariie and gave them to the innkeeper. ‘Look after him,’ he said, ‘and when I return, I will reimburse you for any extra expense you may have.’

36“Which of these three do you think was a neighbor to the man who fell into the hands of robbers?”

37The expert in the law replied, “The one who had mercy on him.”

Jesus told him, “Go and do likewise.”

So, how do we ‘culture-ize’ this to today?

How do we deal with people with hearts not like ours? Do we only deal with the bleeding and broken ones? Do we only help the ‘elect’?

[Answer: since WE don’t know who the elect is, only God does, we should help them all]

How do we deal with people who put animal rights over human rights?

or people who have a passion for equal rights?

or people who put on form of political involvement over another?

or people who love one sports team over another?

or people who are passionate about a certain job or career? or people who adore their children and grandchildren?

All these people have a right and partly an obligation to have these passions.

But we seem to think that if someone else has a different passion, we can scorn them. Mock them.

Sometimes these passions get out of hand and become idolatry. If this is the case, we lovingly and kindly set them on the path of knowledge and truth.

I don’t know, maybe, just maybe, we should ponder where that other passionate person came from? What sparked the ideals they cherish? Maybe be kind and gentle even though their passion might be the opposite of yours.

Maybe.

Merry Christmas!!

 

 

Inherent Dignity & Value. Musings of… God’s Image

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We all are made in God’s Image. Inherent. Dignified. Value.

Of great pearl.

Pray on this, to feel this truly, knowing Gods love for you and the specialness of you

Inherent

adjective
1.
existing in someone or something as a permanent and inseparable element, quality, or attribute; inhering :

Synonyms
1. innate, native, inbred, ingrained. See essential.

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Dignity

noun, plural dignities.
1.
bearing, conduct, or speech indicative of self-respect or appreciation of the formality or gravity of an occasion or situation.
2.
nobility or elevation of character; worthiness:
dignity of sentiments.
3.
elevated rank, office, station, etc.
4.
relative standing; rank.
5.
a sign or token of respect:
an impertinent question unworthy of the dignity of an answer.
6.
Archaic.
person of high rank or title.
such persons collectively.

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Value

noun
1.
relative worth, merit, or importance:
the value of a college education; the value of a queen in chess.
2.
monetary or material worth, as in commerce or trade:
This piece of land has greatly increased in value.
3.
the worth of something in terms of the amount of other things for which it can be exchanged or in terms of some medium of exchange.

4.
equivalent worth or return in money, material, services, etc.:
to give value for value received.
5.
estimated or assigned worth; valuation:
a painting with a current value of $500,000.
6.
denomination, as of a monetary issue or a postage stamp.
7.
Mathematics.
magnitude; quantity; number represented by a figure, symbol, or the like:
the value of an angle; the value ofx; the value of a sum.
a point in the range of a function; a point in the range corresponding to a given point in the domain of a function:
The value of x 2 at 2 is 4.
8.
import or meaning; force; significance:
the value of a word.
9.
liking or affection; favorable regard.
10.
values, Sociology. the ideals, customs, institutions, etc., of a society toward which the people of the group have an affective regard. These values may be positive, as cleanliness, freedom, or education, or negative, as cruelty, crime, or blasphemy.
11.
Ethics. any object or quality desirable as a means or as an end in itself.
12.
Fine Arts.
degree of lightness or darkness in a color.
the relation of light and shade in a painting, drawing, or the like.
13.
Music. the relative length or duration of a tone signified by a note.
14.
values, Mining. the marketable portions of an orebody.
15.
Phonetics.
quality.
the phonetic equivalent of a letter, as the sound of a in hat, sang, etc.

verb (used with object), valued, valuing.
16.
to calculate or reckon the monetary value of; give a specified material or financial value to; assess; appraise:
to value their assets.
17.
to consider with respect to worth, excellence, usefulness, or importance.
18.
to regard or esteem highly:
He values her friendship.