This Cannot Be

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Ya know how your life is blessed and you pretty much have everything you could want,

but you still wake up sad every morning?

Ya know how you think things, places, people will make your life better,

but in your heart you know they won’t?

Ya know how you feel miserable in a given situation,

but the only thing that will change it is you?

Ya know how you want to run away,

but know that if you do, it will still be the same, because you are the same?

Ya know how you eat right, exercise and sleep ok,

but you’re tired… All. the. damn. time?

This can not be what life is like. It just can’t be.

 

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About Kristina

52 year old Christian lady, knitter, crafter, church admin, thrill seeker (only when shopping at thrift stores for tremendous bargains) my 3 dogs and my pigs servant, a child of God, saved, redeemed and trying to be joyful in a fallen world.

One response »

  1. Completely different situation, but what you described is EXACTLY how I felt when I was battling depression. Felt like someone had a wet heavy blanket over my emotions. .it drove me bonkers…, and you are exactly correct when you go down that list of things..everything on an informational/ intellectual level is hunky dory rehearse all of the things I had to be thankful for,..and yet..that dark, heavy, soul sucking sense would not lift…and then ever so gradually, it did begin to break up….In my case, I still credit my friend Thomas who would listen to me, and allow me to vent, and rant, and make my case, and he would listen, and validate, and you know Kristina, it was like poison, Thomas told me @ one point, it got him stirred up, pit in his stomach like heart burn….I say all of that to let you know, I hear you. DM

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