Monthly Archives: February 2008

Sowing Words of Praise

Standard

A soothing tongue is a tree of life. Proverbs 15:4

Everyone loves to be praised, and your mate is no exception. William James wrote: “The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.” And Mark Twain said, “I can live for two months on a good compliment.”

Praise is valuable because it is a virtue seldom practiced! We seldom praise our employees; we seldom praise our kids, and we seldom praise our mates. Yet, our homes ought to be a haven where praise is liberally applied.

Carefully read this definition of praise: to give value, to lift up, to extol, to magnify, to honor, to commend, to applaud. If you give some creative thought to this definition, you can come up with hundreds of ways to praise your mate.

The more you verbally express your appreciation (praise), the more secure your mate will become in his or her self-esteem.

Have you ever asked someone to repeat a compliment?

I have. “Oh, you really liked our FamilyLife Marriage Conference?

Tell me what meant the most to you.” Inwardly, I am saying, “Yes, I need to hear this! Would you tell me one more time so I can relish your comments for a few seconds longer?”

Life can seem intolerably heavy at times, and a good, encouraging word can help to lighten the load and lift your mate’s spirits.

Arnold Glascow has said, “Praise does wonders for our sense of hearing.” It also does wonders for our sense of sight. When you praise another person, you take your eyes off yourself and focus on someone else for a few, brief moments.

This positive focus on another person not only helps to put his or her life in perspective, but yours as well.

Discuss: When was the last time you made an effort to praise your mate? Praise your mate three times before you go to sleep tonight.

Pray: That God would give you creative ideas on how to praise your mate. And if you haven’t ever done it, take a few minutes in prayer and praise God for who He is and what He has done in your lives.


Excerpted from “Moments Together for Couples” by Dennis and Barbara Rainey.
Used with permission. Copyright 1995 by Dennis and Barbara Rainey. All rights reserved. To purchase the book, visit ->

 http://store.familylife.com/detail.asp?id=1170

So how good are you at giving praise? I’m terrible at it, I need to keep this in the forefront of my mind……

God give me strength and a tender heart to think of the positive and give others praise…

 

Advertisements

Take Time to be Wrong

Standard

 Have you ever coughed so hard you puked AND peed yourself?

Well, thats how I spend my weekend.

Fever spiked at 101.5 on Friday night and has been on a decline ever since.

Had to get out of bed cuz my hips and butt were hurting from laying down for so long. Now I sit at the computer, staring at it, but reading makes my head hurt.

adn i typ, thinking I’m actually spelling out worda nd look at the screen and its all just gibberish.

*seriously, that last sentence I didn’t modify.

So read this drafts archive post, send me some love and healing prayers ~ Kristina

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Take Time To Be Wrong

 Agreeing with others, especially when they are pointing out your faults, is not easy, but it can play a crucial role in peacemaking. When you are talking with another person, first listen for the truth, resisting the temptation to defend yourself, blame others, or focus on points of disagreement. Ask yourself, “Is there any truth in what he or she is saying?” If your answer is “yes,” acknowledge what is true and identify your common ground before moving to your differences. Doing so is a sign of wisdom and spiritual maturity. “Let a righteous man strike me–it is a kindness; let him rebuke me–it is oil on my head. My head will not refuse it” (Ps. 141:5). “He who listens to a life-giving rebuke will be at home among the wise” (Prov. 15:31; cf. 15:5; 17:10; 25:12). By agreeing with the other person whenever possible, you can resolve certain issues easily and then focus profitably on matters that deserve further discussion.

Taken from  The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict
by Ken Sande, Updated Edition (Grand Rapids, Baker Books, 2003) p. 168-169

Food for Thought

Think back to arguments you’ve had. Can you recall a single instance when quickly defending yourself from the criticism of another brought peace? In contrast to a quick defense, James exhorts us to be “quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (Jas. 1:19). Consider the beginning of Proverbs 15:31: “He who listens to a life-giving rebuke…”  Simply put, listening requires time–and reflection on what’s been said. You have literally nothing (except pride) to lose and everything to gain by listening and not responding quickly when someone points out what they believe to be a fault of yours.

The next time someone brings a rebuke your way, restrain yourself from offering your verdict on their rebuke–whether that verdict be positive or negative–until you’ve had time to check in with the Lord about it. Tell the other person, “That’s hard for me to hear, but I know I need to be quick to listen and slow to speak. I’d like some time to think deeply about what you’ve said.” If it turns out that you still disagree with the other person, at least you’ll both have the benefit of knowing that you’re not responding at the jerk of a knee.

Photos By a Budding Professional

Standard

Love this post from Hope

Oh, and I really have to give these guys kudos, they do my PDF’s at no charge! Click here and give them some love!

I’ve been coughing and snotting for a couple days now, doesn’t it just suck when you go on a nice vacation, then come home and get sick?

So nothing interesting has happened this week, except getting home from Mexico, trying to get stuff back into order and having the stove go out on us, one more time.

Has anyone ever gotten their bag searched? I did, and got this lovely little note in my suitcase, with my scissors pulled out. I has some blunt kid scissors in my knitting bag in the suitcase.

The trip wasn’t very newsworthy, because we have been there before, and really we just sat by the pool, ate, swam, sat by the pool, ate, slept.

I took the boy jet-skiing and he screamed in my ear the whole 30 minutes. Dad took him snorkeling and he accomplished 2 minutes under water (can’t say that I blame him, I don’t like snorkeling either)

I haven’t had a short sleeve shirt on since I got my tattoo and being in a bathing suit made it easy for everyone to stare at me, I would forget about my arm and wonder why everyone was staring at it 🙂

Some guy read it to me in Hebrew, which I thought was pretty exciting, then asked me if I knew what it meant. Duh!

Cabo has a Walmart and Sam’s Club now, and it’s the hot spot in town. We bought some coffee there and it is awesome, just some cheap mexican coffee but it has cinnamon or its caramelized or something, it’s just really good. Bought a few bag to give to the gringos back home.

It was weird to walk into Walmart and see everything in spanish.

Aside from the fact my mind is racing all the time with conflicts in the family and my sleep is next to nil, we had a good time relaxing.

Oh, Mexicans do NOT know what a vegetarian is….

My friend told most foreign countries don’t, except Britain, which I guess they are coming around.

I ate nachos and quesadillas most every meal with salads, plus my morning protein shake. We came home and immediately went to our favorite teriyaki place here in town and devoured some good veggies, rice and… meat; for the boys.

Blessings on your weekend, tell me what are you gonna do this weekend?

For us, the big trip is to Costco.

Downstairs is almost done, pics forthcoming 🙂

Kristina

1 Peter 1

13Therefore, prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed.

 14As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance.

15But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do;

16for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.”

Don’t Be a ‘Chocolate Only’ Christian

Standard

Don’t Be a “Chocolate Only” Christian! 

Through Jesus you can also experience genuine peace within yourself. Internal peace is a sense of wholeness, contentment, tranquility, order, rest, and security. Although nearly everyone longs for this kind of peace, it eludes most people. Genuine internal peace cannot be directly obtained through our own efforts; it is a gift that God gives only to those who believe in his Son and obey his commands (1 John 3:21-24). In other words, internal peace is a by-product of righteousness. This truth is revealed throughout Scripture:

“You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you” (Isa. 26:3).

“The fruit of righteousness will be peace; the effect of righteousness will be quietness and confidence forever” (Isa. 32:17; cf. Pss. 85:10; 119:165).

“If only you had paid attention to my commands, your peace would have been like a river, your righteousness like the waves of the sea” (Isa. 48:18).

These passages show why it is impossible to experience internal peace if you fail to pursue peace with God and peace with others. Internal peace comes only from being reconciled to God through his Son, receiving his righteousness and the power to resist sin, and then obeying what God commands. “And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us” (1 John 3:23). By God’s design, the three dimensions of peace are inseparably joined. As one author expressed it, “Peace with God, peace with each other and peace with ourselves come in the same package.”

Taken from  The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict
by Ken Sande, Updated Edition (Grand Rapids, Baker Books, 2003) p. 46-47

Food for Thought

Authentic biblical peace is like Neapolitan ice cream. Peace with God is like the chocolate. Peace with others is like the vanilla. And peace with ourselves is like the strawberry. Some folks, when presented with a carton of Neapolitan ice cream, eat only their favorite flavor (usually the chocolate, right?) before putting the 1/3-empty package back in the freezer. When subsequent snackers drop by, they become crestfallen: Neapolitan without one of the flavors just isn’t Neapolitan!

 Much of modern Christendom is like this. “Christian” is too often understood only to mean “at peace with God.” Rarely are Christians encouraged to dig their spoons into the vanilla and strawberry dimensions of the faith: making peace with others and experiencing peace within. Sure, the chocolate is important–you might even say it’s the “best part”, but Chocolate-only Christians will never change the world. Blessed are the true Neapolitan peacemakers, for they will not be confined to the freezer for long!

Ok, this is kind of a silly analogy, but I love the Isaiah passage.

17 This is what the LORD says—
       your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:
       “I am the LORD your God,
       who teaches you what is best for you,
       who directs you in the way you should go. 
 

   18 If only you had paid attention to my commands,
       your peace would have been like a river,
       your righteousness like the waves of the sea. 
  

  19 Your descendants would have been like the sand,
       your children like its numberless grains;
       their name would never be cut off
       nor destroyed from before me.” 

 Isaiah 48:17-19

Comments? Whats your favorite ‘flavor’? Kristina

10 Things You Should Never Say to a Woman/Man?

Standard
 Here are 10 things most women don’t want to hear:
1) “What did you do to your hair?”
Unless we’ve cut our own hair—this is not common—someone else did something to our hair. It wasn’t us. And most likely we’ve gone to a lot of trouble and expense for it. “I like your new haircut” is infinitely better, and shows you’re paying attention. It’s also far superior to the generic “You look different,” which tells us you’re as clueless as ever.

2) “They both look the same to me.”
We understand you care a lot less than we do about the outfits or the registry dishware we’re asking you to compare. But they can’t possibly look exactly the same, can they? Give us something. Anything. Mentally roll the dice and pick one, so we don’t worry about your vision—or worse, that you don’t care.

3) “Relax.”
A kissing cousin to “Don’t get so worked up,” this generally creates the exact opposite effect you’re shooting for. When you say “Relax,” what we hear is that you think that we’re being irrational over nothing, and this makes us do anything but relax.

4) “I’ve got it all under control.”
Ha! Famous last words. Refrain from using them if you don’t want us to take fiendish delight in your getting lost because you won’t stop for directions (if we’re late, there will be fiendish fuming), or because you’re missing a piece to your flat-screen television because you said you didn’t need to read the assembly instructions.

5) “You’re not one of those feminists, are you?”
Yikes. Chivalry may be nearly dead, but saying this will drive the last spear through its heart. Feminist or not, a woman is likely to be offended by the question. Just be yourself. Be kind, open the door, offer to pay, and go from there. We can choose to accept or share in your generosity.

 6) “When are you due?”
Take one second to imagine a woman turning to you and responding, “I’m not pregnant,” or “I had the baby six months ago,” and you’ll understand why you should eradicate this question from your vocabulary. In one nanosecond, innocent—even considerate—curiosity can turn to deadly, if unintentional, offense. And there’s just no way to recover from this one.

7) “You’re being emotional.”
In the heat of the moment this may be true. But unless you want your partner to become more emotional or get angry, you’re better off keeping this observation and its off-limits follow-up question—”Is  it that time of month?”—to yourself.

9) “You complete me.”
We’ve seen “Jerry Maguire” and most other romantic comedies far more often than you, and while we may (or may not) like cheesy movie lines, they usually fail in real life. We understand that the possibility of romance makes inexplicable things come out of a man’s—and sometimes a woman’s—mouth, but keep the compliments real and honest and sincere and say you love someone when you mean it.
10) “Do you really think you should be eating that?”
Yes. She should be eating it. Even if she told you she’s given it up.
Jessica Murphy is a freelance writer based in Seattle.
From Here
And men don’t want to hear this:
1) “That looks cute.”
For the most part, men hate cute. We don’t want to hear about it, we don’t want to see it, and we sure as hell don’t want to be it. If we come down stairs after getting dressed and you tell us we look cute, there’s a 100 percent chance we’re changing. We’re supposed to be your protector, your rock, and cute does not fit into that picture.

2) “We need to talk.”
These four words shut off a man’s brain faster than long division. When men hear you say that they immediately go into flight mode. And anything they can do to get out of this conversation—and better yet, your apartment—they will. There are plenty of other ways to approach a delicate conversation, and getting us in a place where we feel comfortable is a good start.

3) “It’s just a game.”
Actually, it’s not just a game. Sports are a major part of our lives and the outcome has as much to do with our mood as just about anything else. Is it fair? No. Is it right? No. Is it immature? Maybe. But it’s life. Sometimes we just care too much. We understand that it doesn’t make sense, but you should be happy that we’re that passionate about something. Telling us that “it’s just a game” is like us telling you that Oprah’s just a talk show host.

4) “Nothing’s wrong.”
Please don’t tell us nothing’s wrong. The look on your face could make the toughest guy on the planet weep like a third-grade girl and your arms are crossed so tight you might explode. We’re not mind readers; tell us what’s going on. And don’t make us guess because—believe me—you won’t like what we come up with.

5) “I sound like my mom.”
The mere fact that you might turn into your mom someday scares the hell out of us. Don’t say it, even in jest—it’s not funny. We actually believe (and pray) that the saying “every woman ends up looking like their mother” is an old wives’ tale. If we didn’t, no one would ever get married.

6) “I just want to be friends.”
No you don’t. You just want us to stop calling you. This is a lot like pulling off a band-aid. Do it quick—don’t prolong the agony. Most of us take “I just want to be friends” as “There’s still a chance,” so if there isn’t just make it a clean break and move on.  Everyone will be much better because of it.
7) “Size doesn’t matter.”
Don’t lie to us. We know it does, and we’re doing our best to make up for it in other ways. It’s best just to not say anything at all.
 
Craig Playstead is a freelance writer and father of three. In the past he’s also been a sports writer, game writer and talk show host. From here

Can you think of any others?

Kristina

Saturday

Standard

The in-laws have rented a car and We probably have taken a drive to Todo Santos.

(we ended up not going to todo santos, we instead picked up hubbys brother and son at the airport)

Hubby doesn’t want to drive there, its too far. Not fun sitting in a car in the heat when you could be  on the beach or eating quesadillas at pool side.

Thank goodness for the weight room right by our condo. Sweet. Yes, I use it.

There is a very old, tiny church there, beautiful really, very poor part of Mexico.

Kristina

Ac 9:31
So the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria enjoyed peace, being built up; and going on in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit, it continued to increase.
Ac 20:28
“Be on guard for yourselves and for all the flock, among which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers, to shepherd the church of God which He purchased with His own blood.