Proverbs of a Different Sort

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Respect your parents and rest on Sundays, give to others what is yours.

Share your wealth and your food. Don’t take what is not yours, not even that pen from work.

Do not tell tall tales, exaggerate or lie. People are not impressed with your fibs.

Tell the person who is buying your car the real reason behind it.

Swearing makes you look bad, not cool. Do not make promises you can not keep, or promise upon the Lords name.

Pay the lawn guy what he earns and don’t overcharge the single woman for her groceries.

Open doors for the old and disabled, be patient with the someone who is limping.

Just because a person drives a crappy car don’t look down upon him, or think highly of a man in a designer suit.

Remove the blackberries from your yard and the plywood from the driveway, and speak kindly about the neighbor who does that.

Go help him remove those items. Instead of judging the one who seeks glory for the Lords work, talk to them about their motives, lovingly.

Get over the church split you suffered through, is not God in charge of all? Call them or send them a card.

Take care to do what is right, even with your animals, gardens and clothing. Waste not.

When you have committed adultery, even in your heart, run to your Lord and ask for forgiveness, you will be forgiven.

Don’t be greedy with your food, always keep a portion for the family of 8 that has no income.

Look to the Lord for all your needs; remember Jesus’ blood is life.

Do not wear that short shirt and tight pants; you do not look as good as the model that you saw it on.

Concentrate on your insides; people love a poorly-dressed joyful person more than an evil negative power dresser.

Teach your children to be modest and reverent, we shouldn’t be turning out more fallen child stars.

Do not mock the church; ill-guided as it is, it’s made up of the people Christ came to save.

The daily horoscope does not know your future, neither do the stars, but God does.

Love your grandparents, visit the retirement center, love on the elderly, they are so wise.

You were once like the unsaved miscreant you have to deal with at work every day, love him.

Follow these little guidelines, I am the Lord.

I paraphrased this from Leviticus 19, again working on the writing skills, trying to change words around and use diff. adverbs and adjectives

I still stink.

Blessings, Kristina

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2 responses »

  1. I love your “Leviticus for the modern Christian.” Very cool. You do not stink, writing is tough sometimes. Sorry I missed your Tupper-party, I was having a Pampered Chef one. Have you closed your show yet?
    See you on Reformation Day.

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